Holysmoke In The Home Room

From: Questor Thews

Well, I said I'd tell a story. Here it is.

Shortly after moving to the dorm at UT Austin, I set up HolySmoke on my door. Of course, I called it something different, but I made a nice, pretty document that outlined the beliefs of those that follow the Wholly Cosmic Star Goat and His Trinity(tm). I also made up the Aphostile's Crud(spoof on Apostile's Creed, for those of you in San Borneo), a corollary to my Tenets of Star Goatianism.

Then I thought of a catchy title: "Amen Corner" and got that put on my door.

Of course, the best thing about my door was my Daily Quotes; 2 or 3 quotes from taglines I had picked up on HS.

Oh, what a response! Every Gawd[sic]-fearing African American to ever have the misfortune to be brought up under Southern Baptism or other similar religions had to live on my floor--and they did show their own peculiar brand of love.

Most every day I got stuff like "Fuck off, fag. Get yourself a girlfriend." or "You will burn in hell for this blasphemy!" or "Why do you hate Christianity so much!"...stuff like that. I loved it. People started tearing off my Star Goat stuff, so I had about 40 copies made(I used almost every one of them ;) ) and just put them back up when I was ready. Messages for and against were put on the door, and we had some pretty interesting debates. People were putting up advertisements for parties on my door, it was so popular. They knew everyone would see it.

The funniest incident occurred when they tried to burn my Star Goat documents on the door. The note accompaning this arson was "Next time it will be the door."

He he. The door's metal.

My point? About 2 months into the semester, I RAN OUT OF QUOTES! I made up a few of my own, but they didn't touch some of the best ones gotten here. So, if you all would kindly remain caustic for a long time, I'll have fresh meat! :)

Sure, HolySmoke doesn't make you popular, but it sure does make for a great time!



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